Letters to Taylor: On Battles

Read to Taylor Wojnarowski by her mama at her funeral:

When God created me, he weaved a love for words in my DNA. Two short months ago, I began writing letters to Taylor while spending time caring for her. When I started, I had no intention of sharing them with anyone except for her. After all, to me, words are a sacred medium. Though she has been unable to speak for years, the letters bridged the gap between mine and Taylor’s minds as a unique love language.  

I’ve read that the last sense you lose when you become unconscious or are dying is the sense of hearing.  Whenever I read each of the letters aloud to her, it seemed that her kindred spirit nodded in agreement with mine. The more I thought about it, the more I felt the Holy Spirit whispering to my heart to share the letters with others. Today I’m sharing the most recent letter. Please listen for a moment to this letter to Taylor: On Battles.

Letters to Taylor:

On Battles

My sweet girl,

Since you were 4, I’ve known that the day would come when your battle with MPS would be over. Not knowing when it would end was difficult and my desperation for you to be well escalated as your suffering worsened, especially in the last couple weeks.

I’ve never felt as helpless as I did when you continued to gasp for breath, hour after hour.  I must have whispered in your ear over a thousand times to go to Jesus. I told you that Mommy couldn’t fix it and make it all better. I reminded you that you needed a new body and heaven would give you just that. I begged Jesus to come and scoop you up in his mercy.

But you? You are a fighter. You came into this world fighting for each breath. You lived each day fighting to do things I often take for granted. You would leave no other way than fighting.

Do you remember the only verse you ever memorized? The verse was from the famous David & Goliath story.  “The battle is the Lord’s.” Your memorization of this verse was a foreshadowing of your entire journey and how our family would make it through, by remembering that we do not fight with the flesh but by the power of the Holy Spirit and the Word of God. I know, that sounds all preachy, but basically you taught me the way to win the battles on this side of heaven is by surrendering myself and all things to God every day. There is no better way to live. There is no other way to live.

Some would say “I’m so sorry that your daughter lost her battle with MPS.” I couldn’t disagree more. You didn’t lose anything.

You, my Taylor, are a warrior. You are the winner. As I stand over the shell that once housed the real you, I can only try to imagine how beautiful and whole and happy you are in heaven.

While the hole in my heart won’t heal until I meet you there, I’m so grateful that your battle is over and sweet victory in Jesus is yours. You have always been a beautiful spirit with an uncooperative body. Now you are a beautiful spirit with an incomprehensible body.

I can hardly wait to see you again.

All my love,

Your Mommy

PS: I’m guessing you already know now. But guess what Wojnarowski means? It means “warrior.” Go figure.

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    18 Comments

    1. Joe D'Ambrosio says:

      Your eloquent thoughts put into words, allow us to see our faith more clearly and better understand our mission here on earth is only a prelude of what is to come. Reading your letters to Taylor, we realize how very important it is to know our Lord in the light you’ve turned on for us. Guardian Angels here on earth took very good care of his little angel now in heaven.

    2. Ellen Stevens says:

      What a beautiful testimony of His love and grace! Rejoicing with you that your girl is fully healed. Praying for Jesus to comfort and encourage you and your family’s loss of your precious Taylor!

    3. lateeshia says:

      Thank you so much Mrs. Rachel for sharing your stories I’m so sorry for your lost but, God is a healer and keeping u all in my prayers God bless!

    4. Good Morning Rachel! Thank you for sharing your heart thoughts for Taylor! I know she shared your trust in God and His promises. I am thankful for the healing Taylor has received. May God continue to bless you and your family with the needs of your hearts for each step you take! You are all in my prayers!

    5. Irene Kiiza Onyango says:

      Rachel,
      I thank God for the grace he betowed upon you to walk Taylor’s journey. Glad He has taken her to a better place and even better is that you stayed by her side all through.
      God heal every wound and fill every vaccum. Taylor’s story was not for nothing, this is just the begining of what God is doing through you to help many in the Kingdom.
      Receive my warm hugs, you are a loving woman and a woman of valor, beauty and understanding. Thank you for the example of especially worship in difficult times.
      We celebrate Taylor and also trust God to make everything beautiful in your family.
      Amen my dear,
      I know, I know, I know…

    6. Rachel, there are so many days when I push through the battles I face, and I thin of you. I pray for you. And I am encouraged by your sweet, loving spirit that so sweetly shares the wisdom and love of God with us.
      I pray for all of you as you adjust to this new reality. God bless you all!
      And I thank you for sharing with all of us to lift us up and encourage us to live our reality, in faith.

    7. Kim Willard says:

      Thank you for sharing your letters to Taylor. They are so beautiful and illustrate your love for your daughter. You definitely have a gift with words. I’m praying for you and your family while you work through this process.

    8. Rachel & Family,
      I dont know you or your family personally but I feel God lead me to you through a radio station I listen to daily. I feel blessed to have been able to read your letters to your beautiful Taylor. Your writings are beautiful and your love radiates through and through. Taylor was blessed to have you! And I know you were blessed to have Taylor. Daddy Matt another blessing. I will continue to keep all of you in my prayers. Please keep writing and sharing life! Much love to each one of you!

    9. Beautiful words for your precious girl.

    10. This is beautiful! I pray for you and your family that God will heal you and bring you through the next stage in life. God bless you!

    11. Dear Lord even though we know Taylor is with you in heaven, please be with her parents and family as they miss her Amen Thank you for sharing your story and for all the reading plans. ??.

    12. Rachel, thank you and your family, for sharing Taylor, and your Faith with us. By his stripes, she has been healed, and her life in heaven made brand new. You and your entire family are in my thoughts, and Prayers.

    13. Dan Dougherty says:

      Rachel & Mr. Wojo –

      I feel God’s Love cushioning that hole the loss of Taylor’s human form has left!
      I can picture Jesus and Taylor skipping down the golden roads of Heaven!
      My heart goes out to you and your family!
      God has truly Blessed you with His Strength!

    14. Love your whole letter. But the last PS statement about the meaning of Wojnarowski aka “warrior” makes me ponder that maybe Taylor was waiting for the final deed of going to Jesus with her warrior name. I know from your writings she had a lovely relationship with Daddy Matthew and her siblings. But who’ll know until the day you meet her in Heaven. Bless you all and your hearts. Especially you the momma who gave birth to her 22 years ago. That “Taylor hole” will be there but the reminders will be pleasing of all the years you had her in our world and the growth you and the family were blessed with just by serving her and most especially loving her. Sweet sweet girl. She’s resting in Jesus arms. Always. Thank you for sharing. You should put your letters in print. Sending more prayers as you continue to remember her.

    15. Rachel,
      Continued prayers are being offered for you and your family. I do appreciate your letters to Taylor that you are sharing. They are touching lives and changing/helping lives. Eternity will only show you just how much. I thank you for them.
      In Christ,
      Brenda

    16. Anna Hopper says:

      Thank you so much for sharing these beautiful letters with us. I’ve read them and prayed for your family while being so honoured to glimpse the love that surrounds Taylor. I don’t have the gift of words as you do so I hope I have conveyed how special it has been to follow along xx

    17. Sharron DuBose says:

      Rachel,

      I have been thinking about and praying for you and your family. I admire you for your strength and courage. Thank you for everything you share with us.

      1. Sharron, that was beautifully said, and expresses my thoughts, and feelings perfectly. Heaven is going to be so wonderful, especially after “The Rapture” and all of the redeemed are there forever more.

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