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Divorce hurts. I don’t have to tell you that if you’ve been through it or know someone who has. Perhaps you’ve been affected by divorce because a loved one or family member who struggled through their marriage and legally ended it. Maybe you’ve suffered through it yourself. As I write this post, I have a backlog of email in my inbox from readers; many of which address issues of family struggles, especially including divorce.
I’ve shared with you that almost 15 years ago, my marriage with my first husband ended in divorce. As one of the most difficult periods in my life, I’ve never forgotten how much I needed support to figure things out and understand God’s plan for me. I’m not here to point fingers or delve into all the reasons that divorce happens or preach about my personal beliefs on the issue. I simply wanted to describe a few ideas- 5 resources to promote healing after divorce. These opportunities are ones I would have loved to have when I was struggling all those years ago. And some of them I just don’t know what I would have done without.
1. DivorceCare Classes
My church offers a divorce care class one evening a week at the church for 13 weeks. There is a small fee for the book, but scholarships are available to assist in covering that fee. If you or someone you know is in need of someone to walk alongside you through this crazy hard time, then you can find a class through the DivorceCare website by entering your zip code. You can also contact your local church to see what classes they offer. Some Divorce Care classes include a special class for children affected by divorce; be sure to ask for availability in your area. The DivorceCare website includes information by zip code for classes for children.
2. Focus on the Family and Counseling Services
Focus on the Family has a wonderful library of articles and .pdf’s for those who are going through or have gone through divorce. Biblical counseling can be so very helpful and supportive during or post marriage struggles. I strongly suggest that you first contact your local church for counseling, but I understand that some of you may not have counseling services available to you through your church for various reasons. Focus on the Family has an incredible tool called the Counselor Locator. Their network may help you find just the counselor God has for you during this tough time. They also offer a free service to speak to a Focus on the Family marital counselor and you can submit an online request for this service. Check it out here.
If you feel really alone, can’t reach out for person-to-person help and need to get to the point to where you can even discuss the difficulties of divorce, then this book is a great tool to help you begin to find the words you need.
Recently I’ve been introduced to Kay Arthur’s 40 minute Bible studies and this very helpful book, Finding Hope After Divorce, is one of the studies in the series. These 6 week, no-homework Bible study is a great tool for those who have gone through divorce. This study is one I definitely wish I would have had those many years ago when I went through divorce; Kay has experienced the first-hand devastation that accompanies divorce. She presents God’s promises of healing beautifully and I can’t recommend this resource enough.
5. Read the book of Psalms.
Without attending church weekly and reading the book of Psalms day after day, I don’t know how I would have ever realized God’s love for me and his plan for my life in spite of messy mistakes. His never-fail plan of redemption is beyond our scope of imagination. Trust him. He hates divorce because of the pain it causes, but one has never gone too far to be used by him. As the Healer and Redeemer, he simply wants us to trust him.
I’m working on my individual replies to emails, so if you’ve sent one, please know I will get to you! In the mean time, prayers for you and seek him. He promises to show up. Right there in front of you.
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