Ebook Giveaway by Author Sheila Gregoire- CLOSED

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AND THE WINNERS ARE:

Colette

Emma

You’ll receive an email! Thanks for your comments and you can click on the giveaway photo above if you’d like to purchase the ebook!

Today I have the privilege of hosting Sheila Gregoire and introducing her awesome ebook, 31 Days to Great Sex for Married Couples.    I had the privilege of meeting Sheila and eating a meal with her at Allume.  She is quick-witted and fun; her material is Biblical and informative, as well as practical. Here’s what she has to say:

It’s 11:15. You’re in bed beside your husband when the nightly monologue in your head starts anew:

“Is he asleep yet? I wonder if he’s waiting to see if I’ll make a move. Do I want to make love? I’m awfully tired. But I’ll feel guilty if I don’t. Okay, I need to get up by 6:30. That’s 7 hours and 15 minutes. If we had sex right now, how long would it take?”

As your conversation with yourself continues, you realize that if you had jumped your husband in the first place, you’d have been asleep by now!

Sex and motherhood don’t always seem to go together.
We’re exhausted, we have people hanging on us all day, and we desperately want some time to ourselves. Many of us would much prefer a bubble bath—alone—with chocolate. All too often sex seems like just something else on our never-ending to-do list.

It’s easy to blame our husbands for this. “If he just accepted me and helped me and loved me whether or not we had sex, we’d have a better marriage!” Yet that’s not being fair. We women need to feel loved to make love. Men tend to make love to feel loved. It’s easily a recipe for disaster! But perhaps there’s a way out.

Too often we equate sex with something that is only physical. We make love so that he’s not “so desperate”. But what if sex is supposed to connect us intimately, on all levels? God designed sex so that it would connect us emotionally and spiritually, and not just physically. And when we put off sex, one of the reasons we start feeling badly about our relationship is that we feel like something’s missing. And that missing ingredient is intimacy.

So how do we get it back?

Understand Your Own Libido

In movies, the couple always falls into bed while ripping each others’ clothes off. Both are obviously aroused.

But that’s not how most women work. Rosemary Basson, from the University of British Columbia, found that in women desire is usually a product of making love, not the cause of it. In other words, most women don’t start out making love “in the mood”. They get in the mood because they decide to throw themselves into it, and once they start, their bodies catch up.

Believe the Benefits that Sex Brings

When you’re exhausted and run down from caring for kids, sex is often one of the best cures. When you make love, you sleep better! You fall asleep faster and your sleep is more productive. So spending some time being more active with your husband, even if you’re tired, will help you feel more rested.

Finally, the more intimate we feel with our husbands, the better we’ll feel about ourselves and our marriages. Our marriage is the rock that lets us be good parents. And once you’re a parent, your marriage matters more, not less, because now other people are counting on you! If we stop making love, then we often feel distant from our husbands. And it’s hard to raise kids, or to even feel positive about yourself,
when you feel like that intimacy is missing.

Make This Into Your Own Research Project

God designed us for an abundant life full of passion–passion for Him, and passion for our husbands. Why should we settle for less? Sometimes we’re just exhausted. Sometimes sex doesn’t feel that great, and we wonder what all the fuss is about. Yet a rock solid marriage is the key to so much happiness, satisfaction, and joy. If sex has become something mediocre, or become something on your to do list, don’t settle for it! You were designed for more. God was the one who created us to feel intimacy in such a weird and wonderful way. Why should we miss out?

Yet where do you start? If sex has always been ho hum, and you wonder what all the fuss is about, how can you fix that? Or if you find that it doesn’t feel intimate, but it’s something that’s always rushed, how can you make it more meaningful?

31 Days to Great SexThat’s why I wrote the 31 Days to Great Sex. It’s 31 days of challenges that take you step by step through building a great and intimate sex life. Each day has one to three pages of readings, and then a challenge. The first week we focus on the lies and misperceptions we sometimes believe about sex; the second week we focus on emotional intimacy; the third week on physical fireworks; and the fourth week on
spiritual intimacy in the bedroom.

Couples have told me that the best benefit was that it gave them a vehicle for finally communicating together. And it’s only $5 (and it comes with coupons you can put in your husband’s stocking to make it a Christmas gift). Get your downloadable copy here!

Leave a comment about why intimacy is important to enter to win one of two giveaway copies of The 31 Days to Great Sex. But don’t be afraid to buy it now; if you win, and you’ve already bought it, Sheila will send you a copy of her paperback The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex, a more expensive book!

Sheila is an international speaker, columnist, and the author of The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex. She also blogs everyday at http://tolovehonorandvacuum.com.

53 Comments

  1. Melinda T says:

    Intimacy is important because its a way to reconnect, bond and build up your marriage.

  2. Kimberly Crowe says:

    When life is full and complicated it is easy to feel like there is no safe place for us to fall or to count on. If we have intimacy with our husband we have a safe place!

  3. First of all it’s amazing. And I just notice that it brings a closeness between us as a couple. It’s very important that u keep ur marriage bed or intimacy alive in ur relationship. It keeps I focused and reminds u ur one! 🙂

  4. After 3 kids in 3 years, intimacy has to be marked on a calendar. It feels like more of a chore to mark done than something I look forward to 🙁 I hate that for my hubby and I pray it changes soon.

  5. I know in my heart that intimacy in marriage is critical. But I’m one of those women whose marriage has drifted. My husband and I have not been truly intimate in years. I long for it. Intimacy keeps you connected in a way that nothing else can.

  6. Wendy Lambert says:

    Intimacy is so important because it is a God given way for spouses to stay connected.

  7. Crystal Scott says:

    Intimacy is important because without having intimacy then you wouldn’t have the great sex that married couples are designed to have. Sometimes sex does lack intimacy and thats because we are doing it one to please ourself or because our spouse is in the mood and we aren’t.

  8. Danielle I says:

    Intimacy is important because it allows you, as a couple, to connect as one.

  9. Intimacy is a time for a husband and a wife to express their love, acceptance, and devotion to each other. It binds a couple closely and reaffirms the commitment made before God and to each other. For me, after 12 years, I still get butterflies… 🙂

  10. We’re trying for a baby right now, so intimacy is taking on a whole new meaning. My husband and I have been taking on a whole new level of vunerability with one another, and although we’ve been disappointed for a few months, this process is bringing us together on a new level.

  11. Sexual fulfillment or intimacy is actually my primary love language. it is even more important to me than my husband. this causes some unique challenges as well as benefits.

  12. Jennifer O says:

    Intimacy between husband and wife is important because it is our earthly example of what the relationship should look like between the church (us) and Christ. We need communication, time, and openness to develop that relationship.

  13. Intimacy is important because it bonds us at level that God designed only for marriage.

  14. With a 3 month old baby, it’s impossible to have 1:1 quality time together. That time right after baby falls asleep in the evening (and before he wakes back up again) is the one time of day just for my husband and I. This is when we share ourselves with each other, verbally, emotionally, and physically. Without that intimate time our marriage would be automatic and mundane.

  15. Intimacy is an important way to connect with our spouse. There is no substitute for it.

  16. JHollyhock (aka Jennifer H.) says:

    Intimacy is important because we grow apart without it.

  17. Intimacy is important: My wife and I grew up without seeing it as examples. It is an important tool for your kids to see the basic levels of spouses loving each other so they feel comfortable that they are in a loving family. It will model for them how they should love their future spouse.

  18. Intimacy is important because it is God’s design! He made us with that need! Satan wants to screw it up, the whole picture and we as Christians need to help clear it up.

  19. Kathy Long says:

    Intimacy is a special communication between husband and wife. A way to connect on a different level not known in other relationships. It brings us brings close and brings such peace to my heart knowing that I am his and he is mine!

  20. Intimacy is important for married couples because that’s what God intended for us, as married couples. He knew what he was doing when He designed marriage and intimacy is a very vital part of it.

  21. Intimacy – the key that keeps you looking for opportunities to be together and connects two hearts into one being as only God can ordain.
    Thanks for the giveaway. I have been following Sheila’s blog and appreciate her candid and clear heart to improve marriages.

  22. Intimacy is important because without it, we might as well just be roommates.

  23. Intimacy is important because it binds you together.

  24. Intimacy is important because it allows you to connect on a level that God designed within marriage.

  25. Intimacy is important as it is another level of connection between a husband and wife. And, of course, it is designed by God! 🙂

  26. Intimacy is important because it bonds you to one another. (I definitely sleep better after being intimate, too!) 🙂

  27. Having meaningful intimacy is the only way to be one, as God intended.

  28. God created us to enjoy intimacy, especially in marriage!

  29. I love Sheila! Been following her blog for years and have several of her books. But, not this one! 😉
    The reason why intimacy is so important is because it it the God-designed connection that is meant for marriage. It is what sets good marriage apart from the rest.

  30. Intimacy is what makes a marriage last.

  31. Elizabeth Bailey says:

    Intimacy is important because it is one of the most personal ways I can show my husband how priceless he is to me. When I want him, he feels adored! It also allows me a glimpse of myself of one who isn’t *always* splattered with baby food or having a little one hanging on me. 😉 God has given me the gift of being able to thrill my husband, and my husband’s response makes me feel like the most gorgeous woman in the world! It also brings us noticeably closer emotionally and spiritually and heightens my feelings of being safe, protected, and valuable!

  32. Intimacy is important because it teaches us how to learn to give and communicate with our spouse. It connects you on a deeper level than just ‘friends’. Because it is God’s plan for married couples.

  33. Intimacy is vital to a marriage because you need to trust your spouse with every part of you life and without intimacy, you just can’t!

  34. Intimacy is important because that is God’s plan for a happy and healthy marriage.

  35. Jesus died so that we could have intimacy and oneness with the Father. Intimacy is a closeness and inner connection with someone. To help us picture what that closeness and connection to God looks like, we have marriage: a literal bonding of two people. We were created for that deep relationship and it is important for us both with God and with our spouse, to fulfill our purposes on the earth.

  36. I must say first that I already read Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex and it was really great!

    Intimacy is God’s design to keep husbands and wives connected. Intimate time together is super important to keeping marriage alive!

  37. God created intimacy, it is a very important part of marriage.

  38. Heather R says:

    Intimacy is important because it brings security, faithfulness, peace and love to the marriage. You’re a better spouse and parent when everything is lined up in order that way.

  39. Intimacy is important because it is God’s plan for our marriage; it brings us into the oneness He designed marriage to be.

  40. Intimacy is important because without it a marriage will die.

  41. Intimacy is important because it makes two people more in tune with one another, which makes the team stronger!

  42. Intimacy is a relationship thermometer, it’s important to keep things warm between you

  43. Intimacy tells you a lot about your marriage, from how you do it, to what you think about, and so on.

  44. Intimacy is important because it brings down the walls that we build during the day and over time can be destructive to a marriage.

  45. Intimacy is a world occupied only by you and your husband. It is a special place where it is safe to not only share your bodies, but also your heart and mind. Intimacy is a sacred seclusion that is to be treasured, nourished and guarded.

  46. Intimacy is a world occupied by only you and your husband. It’s your own special place where it’s safe to share your heart, mind and bodies. This sacred seclusion cannot be matched by any other earthly relationship. It is something to be treasured, nourished and guarded.

  47. Intimacy is important because God created it!

  48. Lorri Geeter says:

    It helps to keep the bond you created together through valleys in your marriage.

  49. Intimacy- a unique relationship between husband and wife; a gentle and deep connection cherished by both husband and wife…how do you explain something so special and deep that it defies explanation?!

  50. Intimacy is important because it is a special way for a husband and wife to communicate with one another. It allows us to connect on another level that verbal communication.

  51. Intimacy is important because it brings 2 people closer together with an emotional bond that just can’t be matched or explained. It is the only thing that you are allowed to do with your spouse that you can’t do with anyone else.

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